Commuting for Dummies

This is the worst time of the year to be a commuter on the South Shore railroad. The month between Thanksgiving and Christmas sees a huge influx of tourists who want to go into the big city, see the lights, and go shopping. It is these very people who are the bane of the everyday riders exsistance. So now I am going to offer them a public service, and give them advice on how not to attract the ire of the commuter.

First and foremost, one ass=one seat. There is no quicker way to piss off people who have been working all day, than for them to get on the train and see some idiot with 16 Marshall Fields bags spread out over 4 different seats. We work hard all day, in intense enviornments, many people spending all day on their feet. Your bags have no rights to any seats.

Second-No one cares about your conversations, keep your voices down. Many people have an hour plus commute on the south shore, and would like to catch a nap to relax from a hard day at work. This becomes impossible when the whole car can hear about the sales at American Girl Place.

Third-Use cell phones judiciously and respectfully. Close to the same idea as number 2, no one cares about your arguement with your girlfriend, keep it down.

Fourth-Control your kids. The train isn't a playground, don't let your kids run around and do whatever they want. You really don't want us disiplining your kids for you. The train ride can be long, so make sure your kids have something to entertain them.

Fifth-Pay attention. Know when your stop is coming up. If you don't know, ask, someone will tell you. Commuters know the schedule and the stops just as well as the collectors do, and would much rather be asked a question, than to stop and delay the train because you just missed your stop.

Following these five basics can make everyones ride much more enjoyible for all.